Full Coverage Friday #12: Beauty Essentials for the Chronically Unprepared

For chaos support on the go.

You know that question, “What’s in your bag?” For most people, the answer is probably something like: keys, wallet, phone, a single lip balm.

For me, it’s more like: a half-eaten protein bar, four different concealers, at least one press-on nail, a receipt from 2022 for something I forgot to return, and products I panic-shoved in this morning “just in case” (in case of what, I do not know). Usually, my keys and wallet are nowhere to be found.

Earlier this week, I confessed to being an absolutely chaotic human in every facet of my life—including my beauty routine. And as much as I try to have my shit together before I leave the house, I almost always wind up forgetting something… and having my makeup smeared all over my face within three hours. Because when your beauty routine is held together by dry shampoo, denial, and whatever’s floating around in the bottom of your tote bag… what’s in that bag becomes kind of important.

So in this week’s Full Coverage Friday, I’m taking you inside my actual bag—a chaotic, overstuffed survival kit filled with impulse buys, emotional support beauty products, and deeply unnecessary backups. Think of it as my mobile coping mechanism… with really good SPF.

💄The Beauty Products I Carry Like My Life Depends On It

• The Lip Product I Keep Reapplying for No Reason Except That It Feels Like a Glossy Little Treat: Makeup By Mario MoistureGlow Plumping Lip Serum

  Technically, it’s a plumping lip balm. Emotionally, it’s a coping mechanism. I swipe this on 47 times a day—not because I need more color, but because it makes me feel like I’m doing something productive while spiraling. It’s shiny, hydrating, and just minty enough to feel like a fresh start—plus, it goes with everything.

• The Lazy Girl SPF I Use to Feel Better About All My Other Life Choices: Naked Sundays Hydrating Glow Mist Setting Spray SPF50+
  This mist is for when I know I should reapply sunscreen but can’t be bothered to touch my face (or wash my hands). I just close my eyes, spritz it like I’m in a perfume commercial, and pretend I have my life together. Bonus: it adds a dewy glow so convincing, people think I’m thriving.

• The Blotting Papers That Save My Face (and My Dignity): Skin Gym Blotting Papers
  I may leave the house looking semi-put-together, but give it a few hours and my T-zone is actively fighting for its life. These blotting papers are the only reason I don’t look like a grease bomb by lunchtime. They soak up oil without wrecking my makeup, and are great for wiping away my inevitable eyeliner and mascara drips. Plus, they’re tiny enough to live in every purse, pocket, and emotional support makeup bag I own.

• The Hand Sanitizer That Makes Me Feel Like a Clean Girl, Even When I’m a Disaster: Touchland Glow Mist Revitalizing Hand Sanitizer Spray
  Let’s be honest: most hand sanitizers smell like regret. This one smells like a spa and makes me feel weirdly chic every time I use it. The packaging is cute enough to leave out, the rosewater scent is grown-up beauty editor coded, and I swear the misting pump makes me feel like I have my life together for 0.5 seconds—even when I absolutely do not.

• The $5 Stick That Makes Me Look Glossy and Alive (Even When I’m Neither): Vaseline All-Over Body Balm Stick
  Technically it’s just Vaseline in stick form. Emotionally? It’s my makeup artist, hairstylist, and emotional support balm in one. I swipe it on my lips when they’re crusty, on my cheekbones when I want to look dewy, and on flyaways when I’ve lost control (of my hair and my life). It’s tiny, TSA-friendly, and makes me feel like a minimalist queen—despite carrying five other versions of the same thing.

• The Scent I Spray When I Need a Personality Reset: Sol de Janeiro Hair & Body Perfume Mist
  It lives in my bag because I never remember to apply it before leaving the house. One spritz on my hair and/or skin (we love a double-duty scent) and I go from “gremlin energy” to “girl with a dinner reservation.” I treat it less like a beauty product and more like a reset button for my entire vibe.

• The Concealer That Lives in My Bag Because I Don’t Trust Myself to Do It Right the First Time: Maybelline Instant Age Multi-Use Concealer

  You know that 2 p.m. mirror check that’s never good? This is how I survive it. It’s creamy, buildable, and forgives everything from sleep deprivation to my refusal to blend properly before leaving the house.

The random shit I keep with me at all times

• My bullet journal (for tracking feelings, habits, and occasionally, reality)

• Jones Mints, which are helping me finally quite vaping—a disgusting habit I’ve hidden for years

• A mini rose quartz crystal that was gifted to me on a work trip in Arizona and I forgot to take out of my purse (it lives in there now.)

• My bedazzled Stanley Cup, which spills all over my shit at least once a day

• A big-ass pair of Bose noise-cancelling headphones, because after losing 14 pairs of Airpods, I realized I can’t be trusted with anything so small

• A pair of mini Tweezers, because nothing ruins my day like an errant chin hair

• 1-3 David Protein Bars (cookie dough flavor only), which have become both a hyperfixation and a crucial recovery tool—because I’m finally remembering to eat

• A travel-sized spray deodorant, which I have been known to re-apply on the Subway platform

• A sparkly claw clip that my chaos look intentional—like I chose this look, not like I gave up halfway through trying to do my hair. Bonus: it doubles as a fidget toy when I’m anxious and need something to click.

• These body wipes, because it’s hot as balls outside and my biggest fear is being the smelly girl at dinner

• A cute AF pill case that actually makes me remember to take my meds

Three Good Things

1. A $20 Romcom Fantasy: I ordered a 4-pack of these little boy shorts on Amazon, and they’ve officially become my bedtime uniform. I pair them with an oversized button-down and suddenly I’m the effortlessly hot protagonist in a romcom, post–one night stand, walking to the fridge in search of coffee. Comfy, sexy, and way cheaper than Paige Desorbo’s Daphne sets (which are adorable, but I can’t bring myself to spend $200 on!)

2. Texting the #RehabSquad Instead of Spiraling Solo: I’m getting better at asking for help when I need it. This week, I sent a few “I’m not okay” texts instead of pretending I was fine—and the responses were nothing but compassion. No judgment, no fixing, just presence. I’m still getting used to the feeling of being held by a community that gets it… but damn, it’s healing in a way sheet masks never were.

3. Protecting My Peace Like It’s a Full-Time Job: I said no to a plan that felt like too much. No backstory, no people-pleasing preamble—just a kind but direct boundary that I actually honored. My inner perfectionist (who thinks she needs to show up and be on all the time in order to be loved) was not thrilled, but my nervous system is sending thank-you notes.

What Watched While Dissociating on the Couch

The world’s a dumpster fire, my brain’s a browser with 37 tabs open, and sometimes the only thing I’m capable of doing is lying horizontally and pressing play. Sorry to my “to be read” list.

This week’s dissociation menu:

• Overcompensating (Amazon Prime): Binged the whole thing in 24 hours and audibly gasped at least four times. Funny, sharp, and a little too relatable—especially if you went to college between 2009 and 2016 (the soundtrack is SO GOOD, and really brought me back to pregames in my freshman dorm room). 10/10 recommend if you enjoy laughing and confronting your inner chaos.

• Hacks (Season 4): Still hysterical, still iconic, and somehow triggering in a way that reminded me why I never want to be in a toxic work environment ever again. Healing!

Mental Health Note-to-Self

Your worth is not measured by how “together” you look. Messy buns and missing keys don’t cancel out your magic.

Serotonin Boost

When I’m spiraling, overstimulated, or feeling the pull of old habits, my brain goes: disassociate or self-destruct? So this week, my therapist and I put together this “What Do I Need Right Now?” board as a gentler alternative to my usual coping strategies (see: doomscrolling, vaping, disappearing into the couch for 6 hours). I turn to it when I’m feeling 😵‍💫 and need a menu of low-stakes, high-impact resets.

From "light a candle" to "organize a small space" to "go to a coffee shop just for the vibes," this isn’t about perfection. It’s about options. And honestly? That feels like power.

Impulse Buy of the Week

I ask my husband and my cofounder “have you seen my phone?” so often, I’m genuinely surprised they haven’t both divorced me. I lose it constantly—in couch cushions, under laundry piles, and, once, inside my fridge. So when I impulse-bought a phone chain at 8 AM on my way home from SoulCycle—still sweaty and high on Taylor Swift-induced endorphins—I figured it would be a dumb purchase I’d regret in a week. Plot twist: I haven’t lost my phone since, and it’s actually kind of cute in a fashion-meets-function sort of way. Now, what am I going to do with all the extra time I’m not spending searching?!

Words I Needed to Hear

Saying no to something is saying yes to something else. Even if that “something else” is rest, quiet, or just not falling apart. Boundaries aren’t rejection—they’re redirection toward what actually matters.

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TL;DR: My life is still a mess, but at least it’s a moisturized, mascara-smudge-controlled kind of mess. And honestly? I’ll take it.

As always, thank you for being here. 💗 See you next week, when we’ll be talking about how to feel hot when it’s hot as balls outside—if I survive watching my husband play softball in 100-degree NYC heat on Sunday. PRAYERS FOR ME AND MY EYELINER.